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The Musings of an Eccentric Diva

Welcome to the Musings of an Eccentric Diva. My motto is: Giving Hollyweird movies the finger one movie at a time. Enter at your own risk (insert evil Vincent Price laughter here).
 

GOOGLE GOT JOKES!

The Mini Eccentric Diva showed me a hilarious "trick" using the Google Maps featuring. This was the source of our amusement last night. Below are the driving directions from New York to England. Please read the directions, then pay close attention to direction #23.


New York, NY
Change destination

Drive: 4,044 mi (about 29 days 12 hours)

1. Head southwest on Broadway toward Warren St 0.2 mi
1 min

2. Turn left at Park Row 0.1 mi
1 min

3. Slight right at Frankfort St 0.3 mi
1 min

4. Turn left at Pearl St 56 ft

5. Turn right onto the F.D.R. Dr N ramp 0.4 mi
1 min

6. Merge onto FDR Dr N 7.7 mi
12 mins

7. Take exit 17 on the left for Triboro Bridge/Grand Central Pkwy toward I-278/Bruckner Expy 0.4 mi
2 mins

8. Merge onto Triborough Bridge
Partial toll road 0.4 mi
1 min

9. Merge onto I-278 E via the ramp to I-87 N/Bronx/Upstate N Y/New England 0.6 mi
1 min

10. Take exit 47 to merge onto Bruckner Expy/I-278 E toward New Haven 1.9 mi
2 mins

11. Take the I-278 E exit toward New Haven 0.3 mi

12. Merge onto Bruckner Expy 5.0 mi
6 mins

13. Continue on I-95 N
Partial toll road
Entering Connecticut 62.1 mi
1 hour 12 mins

...
14. Take exit 48 on the left to merge onto I-91 N toward Hartford 36.8 mi
37 mins

...
15. Take exit 29 for US-5 N/CT-15 toward I-84/E Hartford/Boston 0.4 mi

16. Merge onto CT-15 N 1.7 mi
2 mins

17. Merge onto I-84 E
Partial toll road
Entering Massachusetts 40.7 mi
38 mins

...
18. Take the exit onto I-90 E/Mass Pike/Massachusetts Turnpike toward N.H.-Maine/Boston
Partial toll road 56.0 mi
56 mins

...
19. Take exit 24 A-B-C on the left toward I-93 N/Concord NH/S Station/I-93 S/Quincy 0.4 mi
1 min

20. Merge onto Atlantic Ave 0.8 mi
3 mins

21. Turn right at Central St 0.1 mi

22. Turn right at Long Wharf 0.1 mi

23. Swim across the Atlantic Ocean 3,462 mi
29 days 0 hours

...
24. Slight right at E05 0.5 mi
2 mins

25. At the traffic circle, take the 2nd exit onto E05/Pont Vauban 0.1 mi

26. Turn right at E05 5.7 mi
10 mins

27. Take the exit onto A29/E44 toward Amiens
Toll road 27.8 mi
23 mins

...
28. Take the exit toward Dieppe/Amiens/Calais/A151/Rouen
Toll road 1.1 mi
1 min

29. Merge onto A29/E44
Toll road 22.6 mi
19 mins

...
30. Take the exit onto A28/E402 45.6 mi
37 mins

...
31. Take the exit onto A16/E402 toward Boulogne/Calais
Toll road 44.3 mi
38 mins

...
32. Take exit 29 toward Boulogne-Centre/Outreau/Le Portel 0.6 mi
1 min

33. Merge onto N416 1.1 mi
1 min

34. At the traffic circle, take the 1st exit onto N1 0.4 mi
1 min

35. At the traffic circle, take the 2nd exit and stay on N1 0.1 mi
1 min

36. At the traffic circle, take the 2nd exit and stay on N1 0.9 mi
2 mins

37. At the traffic circle, take the 1st exit 0.6 mi
1 min

38. Slight left at Rue Ferdinand Farjon 427 ft

39. At the traffic circle, take the 2nd exit 0.4 mi
1 min

40. Slight right at Dover - Boulougne-sur-Mer 30.1 mi
1 hour 50 mins

...
41. Continue on Dover - Boulogne-sur-Mer 0.2 mi

42. Continue on Eastern Service Rd 0.3 mi
2 mins

43. Turn right at E Ramp 0.4 mi
2 mins

44. Slight right at Dock Exit Rd 0.1 mi

45. At Eastern Docks Roundabout, take the 2nd exit onto A20 0.6 mi
2 mins

46. Slight left to stay on A20 0.3 mi

47. At Prince of Wales Roundabout, take the 2nd exit onto A20/Limekiln St 0.2 mi
1 min

48. At Limekiln Roundabout, take the 3rd exit onto A20 0.3 mi
1 min

49. At Western Heights Roundabout, take the 1st exit and stay on A20 7.0 mi
8 mins

50. Continue on M20 (signs for M20/London/Ashford) 49.7 mi
47 mins

...
51. At junction 1, exit toward C.London/A2 1.3 mi
1 min

52. Merge onto M25 4.4 mi
4 mins

53. Continue on A282 (signs for A282/Dagenham/A13/M11/M1)
Partial toll road 3.2 mi
5 mins

54. Continue on M25 (signs for Watford/Southend/M11/M1/A127) 39.7 mi
38 mins

...
55. At junction 21, exit onto M1 62.5 mi
1 hour 0 mins

...
56. At junction 19, exit onto M6 toward Coventry (North)/Birmingham 10.7 mi
10 mins

...
57. At junction 2, exit toward A46/M69/Coventry (E)/Leicester 0.6 mi
1 min

58. At the traffic circle, take the 2nd exit onto A4600/Hinckley Rd heading to Coventry (Cent) 0.3 mi
1 min

59. At the traffic circle, take the 2nd exit and stay on A4600/Hinckley Rd 0.3 mi
1 min

60. At the traffic circle, take the 4th exit onto Wigston Rd 0.8 mi
3 mins

61. Turn right at Woodway Ln 62 ft

62. Turn left at Ringwood Hwy 0.4 mi
1 min

63. Turn left at Deedmore Rd 394 ft

64. Turn right at Dutton Rd 0.2 mi
1 min


To: UK
Change destination


I guess Google expects you to get your dolphin on in order to make it to England from New York. Funny shit.

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